I wrote this poem "Mother, May I?" because it was a game I used to play as a child. There is a game called “Mother, May I?” where someone plays the mother whose back is turned to the other players. The “Mother” tells a player to take a few steps, and the player must ask, “Mother, May I?” before taking any steps; if they do not then they must stay in place. It is a bit like the game “Simon Says”. I thought about how this game reflected upon my life as a young woman, and how frustrated I would feel when it seemed like there were so many rules to being a woman, particularly a South Asian Muslim woman. I felt that my male cousins and other Muslim young men I saw could be free and do what they wanted, but I could not. It seemed like the older I became, the more restrictions were put on me. As an adult, I feel that I have fought and questioned these restrictions for most of my life. I hope for a day when our daughters will not have to ask if they are allowed take part in implicit freedoms we should all have, whether we are male or female.
Mother may I
take a step
to set my path upon the world?
Mother may I
wander on my own
like my brothers do?
Mother may I
skip, laugh and smile
as long as my laughter is not too loud
nor my smile too wide
Mother may I
pursue my dreams
as long as I have not placed them too high?
Mother may I
take another step forward
or
backward
Mother may I
have the world within my reach
as long as that reach
is not outside the boundaries of my home?
Mother may I
grow beautiful
to only tempt the eyes of a husband
and hope that the world is blind to me
Mother may I
pick up the pieces of glass
from the floor
when I try to step forward
Mother may I
have a man to keep me safe
always?
and always
have something to keep me safe from a man?
Mother may I
hide my sins from a world
that only sees my sins?
Mother may I
have babies to love
and children to hold?
Mother may I
not suffer…
or is that one too many steps
Am I too quick
to reach my destination?
Mother may I
love myself
without being selfish
Mother may I
love others
without losing myself
Mother may I
never have daughters
who look up to me
and ask
Mother may I?